The Quotes Section

Update from Abby. :-) I'm going to try to update this quotes list at least once a week. New quotes will be written in bold so that you don't have to read all the quotes every time you're here. Unless, of course, you just want to. So, new quotes will be written in bold font and will remain in bold for one month. After that, they will be returned to their normal font with the rest of the quotes. Sound good? Sounds good to me, too. Hooray!

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"'Breakfast at Tiffany's' was a strange movie."
~Shawn Misamore

"Business slacks when I slack. But we wear skirts in [Mary Kay], not slacks."
~Juli Sneider

"BUT! And this is a very big but . . . I love to say that . . ."
~Professor Russell Bodi

"But I'm not in love with you . . ." ~Abby Grebe
"Temporarily." ~Andy Ciesler

"But think of the presents!"
~Kevin Fay

"By day, it's a pen. By night, a wonderful mechanism."
~Kelly Everett (referring to Abby Grebe's light up pen)

"Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others."
~Ambrose Bierce

"Can I have a gun, then? Can I have a tazer?"
~Professor James Hodak

"Can we park out at the metered spot?" ~Tim Varner
"Well, I park there illegally every night for work." ~Metro Attendant in Washington DC
"But the signs say '15-Minute Parking, Driver Attended Only." ~Tim
"Yes it does." ~Attendant
"Are there cars parked at those meters?" ~Attendant
"Yes." ~Tim
"Are there drivers in any of those cars?" ~Attendant
"Thank you!" ~Tim

"Christ died for men precisely because men are not worth dying for; to make them worth it."
~C.S. Lewis

"Christian contentment is recognizing that everything is ordained by God."
~Tim Varner

"Christmas is about peace on earth! So gimme another piece of that pie!"
~Randy Fall

"College students have no secret lives! That's why we write freakin' blogs."
~Keith Osmun

"Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
~Peter Ustinov

"Cows will go upstairs, but they won't go downstairs." ~Professor John France
"Ha ha, that was a senior prank." ~Haley Brandeberry

"Customer service is what it's all about."
~Girl in Sociology Class

"Dave Eggars has been picking my brain again. He's modeled himself after the same way 'The Edge' picks at his guitar."
~Keith Osmun

"Dave Frye is like having a lap dog."
~Mike Portteus

"Deep down in my spirit I could hear, 'Bret! Don't do it!' But what I was really hearing was, 'Bret! *radio static* do it!'"
~Bret Smith

"Devaluing marriage devaluates life in general."
~Dr. Bob Forney

"Did you guys know there was such a thing as a cootie shot?" ~Makilah Witt
"Did you used to live under a rock?" ~Keith M

"Did you know that Toledo once belonged to Michigan?" ~Professor James Hodak
"Can we give it back?" ~Haley Brandeberry

"Did you not just look through my glasses? Did you not see China when you did?"
~Joe Metter

"Dingbat: An experienced hobo."
~Amy Shrewsbery

"Dinner? Movie?" ~Dave Frye
*Aimee Reid glares at Dave Frye*
"Shutting up." ~Dave

"Direct sunlight makes me irritable."
~Josh Smith

"Do I look like I'm poor enough to eat Ramen?"
"It's not about being poor! . . . It doesn't hurt . . ." <--- Does anyone know who said this? The computer appears to have deleted that information . . .

"Do you have ADHD?" ~Professor Alvenia McQueen
"Not that I know of but I guess I do." ~Kevin Wukoviak

"Do you have the faith to allow God to be your defense?"

"Do you think I could balance this chair on my nose?"
~Professor Cloyd Payne
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