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Luke's Forum

Here it is in all the glory of it's crappy html!!
unedited uncut!!
Luke's Ravings go here

Private conversations

2/15/06 GREAT SCOTT!!!! POSTING?? FOR ME???
The massive scale updatage is BLINDING!!!
You want more ravings? You don't want more ravings? Oh... I'm sorry. I just assumed that... well. Well I don't really care what you want. I do what I feel like. So prepare to be RAVED at!!! ::music plays and strobe light turns on:: NO NO NO! Not that kind of rave!! This kind of rave!!
I sold my soul to the devil again today. Actually it was kind of a morgage. You know you can't sell the same thing twice and all that. He's got a good rate right now. Interest rates are low. So if you've been thinking about refinancing your soul, Satan's the man to see. And Thus I end this ridiculous paragraph.
Hrrmmm... that last paragraph reminds of the banned Satan comic from a couple years ago. I'm tempted to put it up, but the said Satan party might just start talking to me again... saying angry things again... I figure since I'm talking on the internet I might as well talk about her since that seems to be my main topic of the past. I always figured I could say what I want since she had absolutely no interest in any of the crap i put on the internet. Ah screw it, I'm putting the comic up.

This comic could probably use some explaining but I don't feel like it. Oh yeah, and I know what you're thinking. "Gee, Luke. You sure have might quite a bit of crap in your time."

To that I say, "Yes, my son."

There, Andrew. It's updated.

4/19/05 More updateage anyone??
Uh yeah... this is on gurumuru... But I think it's a classic post. So I'm putting it here. For no real reason... because andry's the only other person that might read this and he's read it already. But regardless!!! I'm set in my ways. And don't ask me what Old Peter is... I really have no clue.

"Dy Ho Er" 3/31/03
Nate noticed in Chemistry today what element 67 said. He showed it to me and we laughed heartily. Then I (being the one with advanced grammer skills) pointed out element 68. We both let out a wimsical high-spirited guffaw.

Next...was Algebra II! Mr. Neitz waved a homework paper around for a while. I didn't bother looking up. I was too busy humming a little jig to myself, "Hum dum dum. I'm so much better then everybody else. La dee dum dum. I'm so much better than the Welsh. Da Dope Da. I'm even better then the Celts..." and so on and so forth. I'm sorry I made you listen to that. It was really dumb wasn't it? DON'T EVER CALL ANYTHING I SAY DUMB!! GOT THAT?! Good. I forgive you. You're only a poor misguided soul. Pretty soon the paper was right in front of my face and everyone was saying it was mine. "You will all be mine..." I muttered under my breath, "SOON YOU WILL ALL BE SUBJECT TO MY EMPIRE OF THE NIGHT!!!!"

Yeah. It was mine, but I pretended that it was hard to tell. It was kind of an excuse for not noticing in the five minutes that he was asking everyone. "Ummmmmmmmmmm....Ummmmmmmm....Ummmmmmmmmm...I think...Ummmmmmmm...That's mine?" I'm afraid of Mr. Neitz. I'm afraid he'll beat me up or something. Or more realistically...I might make him mad and get humilated by numerous words with bad connotations.

Then he says that the next person to say a word was going to get kicked out of class...permeately. Whatever he meant by that... His eyes flashed red and a cold wind blew through the room. For a moment I thought I saw the silloutte of "Old Peter" on the wall, but then I realized...it was Mr. Nietz's shadow. "DOES THAT INCLUDE YOU?!?!" I shouted (in reference to the kicking out of class [I had almost forgotten it {I forget things a lot you know }]) whew. The students cheered and confetti dropped from the ceiling. They lifted me up on their shoulders, parading me around the classroom. "What's all this?!" I laughed, with a sitcom smile. "This is all for you!" They hailed, "MAKE WAY FOR THE KING!" No...I'm not delusional. What would give you that idea?

4/18/05
There's the emo hat. It's really gay. And I'm flooding Andry's server with images and he doesn't even realize it!!!
I helped move an old lady's house today. I did it all with my big beefy arms. And my animal companions helped some, too. Hmm... did anything interesting happen while I was moving her house? Uhhhh... she called me fox. I thought that was funny. And..... strangely attractive. Yes, I don't like women until they reach the ripe age of 40. Am I serious about that? Hmmmmmm.... Am I serious that I moved a house? Am I serious that I have big beefy arms? Is it obvious yet that I'm a pathological liar?
So I'm writing a paper on the romantics and their views on nature. None of you care. ::Boom:: ::Bam:: ::Craaaaaash:: Ok now that I've catered to the groundlings of my nonexisting audience by emoting action movie-like explosions, I have somehow made this post more interesting and/or retarded. Odds are... more retarded.

4/15/05
I think the picture speaks for itself... Narcissism was my word of the week by the way.
Hullo there. It's me again. I'm sorry that I haven't been around. I've been real busy... like... alright sorry. Yeah I've been avoiding you. Sometimes, I just feel like we don't know each other anymore, ya know? It's like... oh, nevermind. I feel stupid saying this. What? You love me? You're sorry? Look... it's not you, it's me. Let's just get on with our lives ok, nonexistant internet audience. I love you but... I"m not IN love with you. Understand?
Today was a landmark in Hillsdale history. Today, April 15, 2005, takes place the very first National Emo Day. There's so much I could say about this holiday that I don't possibly have the space to even say it all. So I've decided that I won't say anything. Well maybe a couple things... guys wearing girl pants, tight shirts with random logos, um... we haven't figured much else out? Hmmmmm yeah I guess I don't really have much to say do I? I like to think that I have a lot to say... but I don't, as you can probably tell from reading other updates on this thing. But oh! will I stop updating? I have for the past 6 months so probably yeah. But don't worry about it. No one cares anyways. Oh, I made an emo hat by the way. Maybe I'll post a picture later. It's really freaking gay, but it's good for emo day. Emo emo, hip hip hooray. They can go away. But ya know what I say. I think they may. Lay by the bay. And eat some hay. And rip more off of that Adam Sandlar movie.

10/17/At the End of Time!!!
This is Wilson. He's my neighbor. He gives me advice. Arrr Arrr Arrrr. Ahoy me mateys!
I really don't know what to talk about right now but Andry's making me update. He's so abusive. I never should've married him. I can find someone better... I just know it. Don't tell him I said that though. This'll just be between you and me. I'm leaving him.
Welp. I left him. Now i'm at Hilldill. Great transition, eh? You can do great sorts of things like that with the power of the internet...and learning. Because Learning is Power. Um..... about HillDill.... what can I say? Well... I spell it different ways frequently. That's one thing. Um....... Well no ones gonna read this anyways so I guess it doesn't matter what I write. Hmmmmm... Oh yeah. My roomate yells at me every frickin time I fart. That makes me mad. Imagine if you will, a world in which guys won't let other guys fart. Then uh.... you just imagined my room. Oh this is no good. This is crap. I'm sorry for writing crap, but it's what I do. Anything else about HilDilll, Luke? Nope. Well I ate Andry's firstborn child today. It was the result of a contract. Quite comical really. I bit it's head off and then... wait... Oh hey. I drink a gallon of water everday. That's a new thing I picked up. I also pee a gallon of water everday. Imagine that. Well... Pee and spit... and digest. Let's just put some more dot dot dots in there for the fun of it..................................................... Fun huh? Speaking of dot dot dot. I want the website www.dotdotcomdot.com Yeeeeop. Try saying that a hundred times fast...... without taking a breath............. Now I'll take my leave before you stone me.

12/14/03
Look! I'm Grizzly Adams!
Ya know... if Snickers bars were called Crap Sticks... I bet they wouldn't sell many. I bet they wouldn't sell many at all.

Oh the update slackage! I'm so ashamed. It's been so long I grew a beard... hence... the photograph above (note: the picture above has not been modified in any way whatsoever and those who would disagree will be shot and/or prosecuted). Never sign a contract called the Emasculation Proclomation. It can't be anything good.

I'm supposed to be writing about syntax of the Scarlett Letter right now. But I'd rather not. So let's see how much time I can waste with the lot of yous. Ummmm. Ummmm. Ummmm. My brain operates on GUI. OH CRAP. I GOT NOTHIN TO SAY AGAIN!

12/8/03
Foooooood=Gooooood
It was ma burthday today... But nuh 'un remembeeeeeeeeeered... God bless us. Everyone.

No... lots of people remembered. So many people said Happy Birthday... I haven't talked to that many people in one day in my entire life! Yeah... listen to the boring words that are coming out of my mouth... Yes... I dictate as I type.

I got a cool hat... maybe I should show the picture... yeah... I'll show it! Har it is!
There ya go. Oh I love the offcenterness of it all. Just one little html tag would fix that, but I want you all to suffer. Especially Andry. SUFFER!

What more can I say here? Oh yeah! Mrs. Shepherd was gone today. Mr. Flamm filled in. "Let's get Chris Youngblood in here and he can play the geetar until she comes back! Hey! Let's prank call Toledo Edison!" I bet no one got that... Oh well. It was an attempt at a joke. Uhhhhh... Too many paragraphs already. This is such crap. Oh well. It's my birthday! Take the crap!

12/6/03
Andry... The muppet vampire... running around... for no particular reason...

I'm really wishing Andry would stop calling this a forum... and why is this text bold? I never told it to be bold!! Just look at the source.

HERE IT IS!! THE LONG AWAITED... UH... THING!

Hello anyone who ever clicks on this link! Welcome to my waste of server space. I'm sure we're gonna have lots of fun here, just so long as we all sit back and uh... what was i saying?

More space!! Take up more space!!!

Oh! This is Luke. Just in case you didn't read the link... didn't read the top of this page... or can't read. In which case it doesn't matter what I say, you won't really care. You're too much of a moron to tell!!! I HATE YOU!! DIE!!! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!!!! That's what I say to people that can't read. At least... that's what I write to people that can't read. I wouldn't say it outloud unless they were deaf and dumb. ::double meaning::

Yeah... Why don't I start a new paragraph? It'll seem like I uh... Seem like I'm saying more stuff. More content. Gotta fill up the page. That's what we gotta do... yeah... Oh hey! Clarence gave me a golf ball the other day. It was sitting up in his office and I accused him of stealing it from me. Next thing I knew I had a golf ball in my pocket... wait a second... I don't remember him giving it to me...

Have you looked around Andry's site? There's a lot of stuff... there's... there's... nachos. And um... and um... lots of stuff. So go take a look around his site some more. Cause I'm goin.